Egoslut's Ego

So, I watched the Oscars last night as I have been doing for the past 20 or so years and it really made me wonder about it’s validity as a show in general. Are they still worth watching or is it just a big commercial for a certain selection of movies and a way of getting actors more money in their movie deals?

First of all, I LOVE THE OSCARS!! I always have. Being an arty kid growing up and then an actor and director, they have always been my Superbowl. I wasn’t really into sports ever, other than wrestling (YAY WRESTLEMANIA!!!), so it was really the big event that me and a like-minded group of people could get together and watch en masse with the same heated enjoyment and anticipation. I especially loved the parties me and Seb used to throw that involved ballots and gambling. It was what every arty kid ever wanted in an event, competition, highs, lows, great outfits and people making asses of themselves. What’s not to like?

However, the past few years, the Oscars really have seemed to figure out this pattern and have turned a fun and long event into a direct representation of everything that is wrong with Hollywood itself. The Oscars have become just as bland, generic and self-serving as the movies that are nominated.

Now I know this is nothing shocking or amazing to most people, but it was always the reason that I gave to people who didn’t watch them when I mentioned I did. I would then spend 20 minutes explaining to people why they were wrong. I can no longer do that.

My love affair with Hollywood has pretty much ended. There is nothing coming out that I get excited about, with a couple notable exceptions (WATCHMEN!!). However, that is less about Hollywood making it than the property itself. Now I am actually finding it hard to get the same excitement back. And last night’s show was a shining example of  crap on a stick pretending it was gold.

Here are my personal highs and lows…

HIGHS:

1. Tina Fey and Steve Martin’s routine for writing awards. IMO Tina Fey can do no wrong, but when she’s matched up against Steve Martin that gold becomes platinum. Best quote: “I’m Steve Martin… and I’m Tina Fey… and I’m Steve Martin.”

   httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPbV5YfV_-w

2. Ben Stiller doing Jaoquin Phoenix. I didn’t like Tropic Thunder at all but when Ben Stiller is on he’s awesome. Maybe he needs to stick to sketch comedy. Plus, Nathalie Portman is one of the best straight men going right now.

   httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yW2L5OObQGY

3. Jack Black’s Dreamworks/Pixar joke. I love a comedian who isn’t afraid to never work again.

   httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HxTv8oljkO8

4. Slumdog Millionaire sweeps 8 of 10. I loved this movie and everything about it. Probably one of the coolest things about it’s winning streak though was watching Danny Boyle excitedly freak out like a proud father when anyone won anything. Plus, the street kids on the stage when they won best pic we’re freakin’ hilarious.

   httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w6xp3ELH7aU

LOWS (I’m not going to provide video here because who wants to see crap):

1. Hugh Jackman in general. The opening number was cute but anytime this guy was onstage I just wanted him to stop chewing the scenery and generally just shut the fuck up. Bring back a John Stewart. Seriously, the Oscars need a good strong comedian to make the 3+ hours not feel like hell. Personally, do you who should be doing it? TINA FEY! That would be awesome. Also, I just don’t like Hugh Jackman.
2. The Five actor winners giving the acting awards. Did this really need to be done? It just made things a little weird and really long. The nom monologues we’re either too gushy or too vague. My favourite moment was when Alan Arkin referred to PSH as SEYMOR PHILLIP Hoffman. He’s Alan Arkin bitches… he does what he wants.
3. Mickey Rourke losing to Sean Penn. Now of all the lows this has to be the one that I’m not HORRIBLY annoyed with. I loved both performances and that Sean Penn did an amazing job with the role of Harvey Milk, but Mickey had a once-in-a-lifetime roles that he did perfectly. It was gold from beginning to end and also the perfect melding of the actor and director and timing. Plus, honestly, we will see Sean Penn here again. I can’t say I feel the same for Mickey.

I don’t feel like dwelling to long on the crap because it’s too much and too painful to have to relive again. Generally speaking, it bored me and just came off as a giant professional wank.

One thing that was cool though, was what was happening on Twitter. As I mentioned, one of the best things about the Oscars for me is getting a group of people together so you can discuss, trash and generally rant about what is on the screen. Well, the live updates that I was getting from the people that I follow felt exactly like that. It was a riot to follow together. Some of my favourite quotes are…

1. jimmyfallon You googling Brodsky?
2. joeyvesh13 What is George Hamilton doing there? Hold on its just Sophia Loren
3. kir I think oscar thank you acceptance speeches should be limited to 140 characters
4. joderkson DEAD people cant win STUFF!!!!!!!!!
5. joeyvesh13 me likey Streep’s daughter!

Ha ha… brilliant.

Well that’s that about that. Talk to you guys later.

e.